A Day in the life of Pleasure and Pain
by kyoshigurelover
Summary: Every day is a day to be remembered, a day to treasure new memories and experiences. For one, every day is an experience filled with pleasure and pain. A Kureno oneshot. Warning: spoilers.


Wow...so here I am. I haven't written fanfiction since May 27th, 2004. Ever since my Junior year of High school, I've been consumed with work and homework. But here I am, off to a brand new start. After writing over 20 Dragonball Z and YuYu Hakusho fanfiction, I've decided to write about a series that I love. Fruits Basket. Except, I start with Kureno. The next one will be Shigure.

Authors notes: This one-shot does contain **spoilers**. If you do not know the extent of Kureno and Akito's relationship, do not read. If you don't mind spoiling it, go ahead. This fanfiction is a day in the life of Kureno. It takes place between manga volumes 15-17. Enjoy! And don't forget to review!

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**A Day in the life of Pleasure and Pain:**

**A poisonous venom**

**By: Lisa**

My eyes open wide as my senses become aware of my surroundings. I bolt upright, stunned by the darkness that overcomes my being. Stunned? Why am I stunned? My life is always in darkness. Akito hardly ever lets me leave this room. Akito always warns me of the dangers and evils of the outside... I, of coarse, disobeyed and went shopping. Disobeyed... why must everyone do that to Akito? I assume it's because it's easy to do so. Someone should ask Shigure. There I was, minding my own business, when Uo-tani (Arisa, I think?) graced my presence. I had never seen anyone so carefree, so happy... she's everything that I've ever wanted. I thought Akito was beautiful...I'm not ever going to admit this, but my feelings for her frightened me. Whenever my eyes would stumble upon her angelic face, I would begin to, dare I say it, dream... dream of tomorrow, dream of a better tomorrow, dream of a tomorrow, with _her_...

No, I had to stop it. I scorned at my own foolishness... I will never be with her. Akito would forbid it. Akito has been betrayed enough... I promised I would never be another name on Akito's list. Akito was so special to me. And yet... meant absolutely nothing.

"_Are you awake, Kureno?"_

Akito's voice was the most beautiful poison that I've ever heard. I loved everything about Akito... and yet, the scars on my heart would peel open every time Akito would say my name.

Living with Akito so long, I convinced myself that pain was pleasure. Pain was a necessity to survive, the only way to know you were alive. I lived solely on this principle. So whenever Akito's lips pressed against mine and I thought of Arisa, and whenever Akito would would feel my body and almost say Shigure's name, I would numb my feelings and push every negative thought away.

In a sense, I was just as bad as Shigure. I was betraying my love with every second I thought of Arisa, every minute I longed to hold her, every hour I dreamt of her. But wasn't Akito just like me? There were countless times when I heard Akito murmur Shigure's name in Akito's sleep, or cry out his name when Akito cried. On these occasions, I tried to console Akito, but Akito would just push me away, just as Akito pushed Shigure away not too long ago.

_You're making the same mistakes, Akito_...

"Yes, I'm awake, Akito."

"_Good."_

Akito's voice was a whip that sent spasms of pain and pleasure throughout my entire body. A black whip.

I knew what Akito wanted. One look at Akito's lustful black eyes and I knew that Akito wanted all of me. But I didn't want Akito... not now. My thoughts are too preoccupied with Arisa that I couldn't think of anything else. The two lustful black holes turned into an inferno and I knew Akito had suspicions. I never knew why Akito was so suspicious... Someone should ask Shigure. The inferno burned with anger, and with a force so powerful that even Hatori would be surprised, Akito grabbed my head and kissed me.

Something strange happens when Akito's lips kiss mine... I feel an euphoria of an unprecedented pleasure that erases all of my wounds. All of the stress and anger immediately clear away, and I know nothing but heaven. But there was something different about this time... there was so much lust and so much power and so much magic that, for several moments, I never even heard the name Arisa.

We make love several times. So many emotions come with making love to Akito that no one will ever understand. Every time was like a new experience, a new game, renewed pleasure. I loved every minute of it. Yet with the pleasure, comes the inevitable pain. I can't help but feel a jealousy so grand, it eats me alive. Even the thought of Shigure kissing Akito's lips was enough to make me wince... they loved each other too. Although they never said it, I know they do. I could tell by the way Shigure's eyes would glisten whenever Akito would speak words of the poison that spreads throughout the members of the Zodaic. I could tell by the way that Akito grabs hold of Shigure, as if they're one entity, as if they've always been like that. Their love for one another is something I can't reach, that I'll never reach. And I'll just stay here until the jealousy consumes me, like a poison.

I_'m dying too, Akito..._

I close my eyes, only to awaken to a brand new day. A new day of lust, a new day of secrets, a new day of betrayal, a new day of love. Akito looks at me with loving eyes... I always wondered where Akito learned that look... Someone should ask Shigure.

Lust becomes power, power becomes pleasure, and pleasure becomes pain.

Welcome to my life.

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Shameless plug: I just recently made a Hatori/Kana music video to the song 'My December' by Linkin Park. If anyone's interested in seeing it, then e-mail me and I'll give you the link!

oh yeah, and review my story please:)


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